December 25, 2022

unto us

Merry Christmas! It is 5:45am. My house is quiet and still. I don't have any illusions that will last long. Magic is in the air for a few of my little ones. We made them promise they can't come in to wake us up until after 7am. But Layla argued she read the blog book and the older boys were allowed to wake her up at 6am. But that was before Santa lived each day exhausted and sleep deprived. 

I am ridiculously behind on sharing our adventures on here. It's funny that the biggest gap I've ever had came just moments before I was almost caught up with the smallest gap I've ever had. Oh how the pendulum swings!

What a year it has been. I blinked and it was over. Time zooms by now as quick as can be. So many things were packed into one year. There were lots of beautiful adventures and travel--like costa rica! And so much grief--losing my mom and saying goodbye to missionary Kyler. Mostly this year has been filled with intense growth for me. I attribute it all to a loving Heavenly Father.

I hope I always feel this close to Him. He is the source of my peace and my strength. It is a very real thing for me to rely on Him, to trust Him, and to turn to Him. He guided me to people who changed me and the course of my life for good. He comforted me in my deep sorrows. In fact, He keeps showing up for me in my grief. He showed me how to find the true divinity within myself--how to access that no matter the circumstances of my life. He taught me the difference between true joy and fleeting happiness. He opened up doors for me. He closed doors for me--and I still ache from that fact. But throught it all, because of it all, my confidence has grown. But it is not confidence in myself--it is my confidence in myself with God's by my side, in front of me, and behind me. 

My thoughts this Christmas morning are this: I don't know eveything, but I know there is a God. I know he loves me, and you. I know our Savior was born, walked the earth, showed us the way, and ultimately sacrificed for us. I know true peace that comes from Him. I don't wish you all the treasures of the world or even the desires of your heart. I don't wish you easy lives. I wish you to know your Savior through it all. He is the Way.