September 22, 2014

Kyler's Name

We recently got Layla and Perry's new birth certificates in the mail with their names, the names we chose, on them. It got me thinking about the significance of the names of each of my children and I decided to record their name stories. 

Kyler had just turned 5 when we adopted him. As soon as we knew the adoption would be finalized we got serious about thinking about what his name would be.

Of course, we would change his last name, but since he was older we were really hesitant about changing his first name, Kylin. Part of me was against it--wasn't his name his identity already? would he be confused? would he be mad at us later? what would everyone think? The other part of me wanted to make the change--did his birth name really fit him? isn't he ours now so shouldn't we be able to give him a name from us, his forever parents? would a new name symbolize a fresh start for a happy life?

We thought about this a lot. Luckily, we had a fabulous adoption attorney who gave us some pretty great advice about changing names or not. We took it to heart and spent a lot of time in prayer and at the temple.

Once we knew it would be right to change his name, we had to decide what that name would be. Our little Ky had basically already given us that answer. We just needed to listen to him.

A few months before adoption was finalized, the boys were being silly in the back seat of the car. They were looking out the window and saying things like "my name is tree head!, call me garbage can head!, my name is car head!" and then somewhere in the midst of that Ky blurts out "my name is Kyler! Hey, wait! I like that name. Can you call me Kyler?" I laughed it off a bit because at the time we weren't even thinking about changing his name.

Ky never let it go though. At least once a week it would come up again and he would ask if Kyler could be his name.

When it came time to choose the names, Eric was the most concerned about changing his first name. We were about to leave to go to the temple one evening, but before we left E decided he should talk to Ky about it. He brought him up to his room and asked him what he would think if we did change his name to Kyler. The biggest smile crept across Ky's face. At the time this was a big deal for this serious kid who kept so much of his emotions inside. Eric said it was the happiest he had ever seen Ky. He asked him why he wanted his name to be Kyler. Ky replied, "Because it has an E in it, like your name". That was all it took--Eric's heart was melted and he was sold!

We still wanted him to have something from his birthparents. We felt like we should change his middle name, which had been his birth dad's first name, to be his parents last name, Radmall.

He became Kyler Radmall Allred.

How cute is little Kyler!

 He's still so cute.